There is a woman who comes into the wine shop to buy sparkling wine every week. THis isn't that strange - but the thing is - she only drinks sparkling wine. 

She is a doctor and a mother and she says that life is too short to drink anything else. 

People are afraid of the bubbly for some reason. Unless it is New Years - a lot of people don't approach that shelf. They think that sparkling is too much hassle, or they know they won't open them or they think that it has to be a celebration for them to pop a bottle. 

I understand this. 

We are quick to consume and achieve and produce - we crave entertainment but we fear decadence. 

The sub-title of this blog is "A Lush Life" because this is one of my fears that I want to face - the fear of savoring this rich, decadent, abundant life. Maybe that seems crazy - but I think it makes sense to many of us - for who am I if I am not stressed or too busy or not always working? What will happen if someone notices that I am not being productive even in my free time?

Yesterday I went to yoga and cooked a vegan dinner. Before you congratulate me for being "good" - I went to yoga because it is a magical space where I feel like I am dancing and the hot room feels good in the cold weather. I cooked vegan because I was hosting a vegan friend.

I don't play the trying to be good game anymore. 2017 is the year I quit the game.

Good is a trap. Goodness is the real thing. That is what beauty is, what grace is, what this life is full of. I am good because I live among this goodness. I am good because I was born into this goodness because it is born inside of me. 

Good has nothing to do with a number on a fitbit or a scale or any other metric. I cannot hack good. I can surrender to the goodness around and within me. I can cultivate and care for goodness and grow it but I can't force it or produce it or fake it. 

In yoga I sat next to a woman who had just come from a bootcamp class and was trying to burn as many calories as possible. I cringe every time a teacher or student mentions how this practice makes it OK for us to be "bad" and get a margarita.

I get a margarita because I like it. I go to yoga because it brings me pleasure.

It has taken me 30 years to realize that it is OK not to go running even if that is the most efficient exercise.

That my life was built for abundance and not efficiency.  

That it is OK to move from a place of love and desire instead of guilt and striving.

This is the year that I embrace the simple pleasures and the rambunctious hedonism of living from desire. Moving how I want, eating what I want, tasting what I want and drinking more sparkling because I like it.

There is magic all around us and I am sick to death of being too busy or important to see it. 

I have too many things to savor and enjoy. 

Each moment is the work and wonder of living - there is no test later that we have to run ourselves ragged studying for. 

This year I am giving myself the space and permission to live in a way that shows I believe this. 

This year but more importantly this moment - I am living drenched in the magic and goodness that abounds.